


what up, grandpa?

by ciaconnaa



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Gen, Humor, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, but people keep calling him old, poor tony wants to go on vacation, superhero business is not kind to the skin, there's a bad word but they put a coin in the metaphorical swear jar, tony peter and baby morgan's trip to disney
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-28
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-12-25 13:28:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18262253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ciaconnaa/pseuds/ciaconnaa
Summary: On the off chance Tony is out and comes across someone who doesn't recognize him, it's not too out of the ordinary for someone to mistake him and Peter for father and son. It's a mistake that he loves, a mistake that warms his heart. Because as far as he's concerned, Peter is his kid and always will be.And when he has another kid, a small and tiny baby girl, the mistake keeps happening. People still think Peter is Tony's son.He just isn't prepared for people to think Morgan is his granddaughter.





	what up, grandpa?

“Which one?”

Tony doesn’t bother to take off his shades as he inspects the two sets of baby sized Mickey Mouse ear headbands Peter has in his hand: both are offensively gaudy, as everything in Disney should be, but there’s an obvious choice.

“Little Mermaid,” Tony scoffs, taking the Cinderella blue ones out of Peter’s hands and practically throwing it back on the shelf. “Duh.”

Morgan, propped up on Peter’s hip, gives a happy shrill and makes weak grabs for the ears that are way too big for her. He lets her put the purple clam shaped ear in her mouth before he laughs and works on putting them on her head. “There!” he finally says, pressing a kiss to her cheek and blowing a raspberry. He gives the green sequin bow a tweak. “Just like Ariel.”

Tony takes a quick picture, sending it to both Rhodey and his wife. “Red hair and all. Pepper’s gonna flip.”

Peter’s grin widens, if that’s possible, before he turns back to the horrifying wall of Mickey propaganda. “Now we gotta pick something for _you….”_ he trails off. “I don’t...I don’t see any dunce caps. A shame.”

Isn’t Peter _hilarious._ But he’s funnier. “There’s a Goofy hat right there.”

“Hah!” he snorts out a laugh. “A contender, no doubt. But I _kinda_ want you to try on some of these tiaras.”

Tony instinctively goes to protect his baseball cap in case Peter feels the need to swipe it. Hat hair isn’t his concern, but it’s been helpful in helping disguise him on their little vacation. He even grew his goatee out into a full beard to be extra sure, even if that meant embracing the fact that his hair was, unfortunately, gaining quite a few grey strands. It's no big deal. He wants this vacation to be all about Peter and Morgan, so it's worth it.

But Peter’s paying him not mind. He’s fully immersed in the stupid plastic tiaras, quietly discussing the choices with her. “Now, I like the Aurora one, you know I do.” He says when Morgan starts to mindlessly pick up whatever is in her vicinity. “But the problem with this one, and perhaps all of them is: can they fit on his enormous head?”

“Oi.”

“Go on,” Peter grins and manages to swipe the baseball cap off his head after all. “Try it on.”

He puts on Aurora’s crown and he’ll admit. It’s a little more snug than he’d like.

“Goofy hat it is!” Peter cheers, and his excitement leads Morgan to give another elated shriek. It makes all heads in the Disney store turn, but they look on with smiles, because a happy baby is a pretty cute baby.

Tony’s quick to put on the Goofy hat since everyone’s staring their way, but it’s not him they’re looking at. All eyes are on Peter and Morgan, the epitome of Adorable. He doesn’t blame them.

When it comes to picking out something for Peter, Tony doesn’t hesitate: the Stitch ears are a must.

“I love Stitch!” Peter says with childlike wonder as he attempts to straighten them with one arm. “He’s always been one of my favorites, I don’t know why.”

“You similar propensity for widespread destruction, If I had to guess.”

“Ah,” Peter nods sagely, playfully accepting the dig. He holds Morgan a little closer as she starts to babble. “We both crashed an aircraft, too, If I remember correctly.”

“Oh, you do. I’m still cutting checks for that, by the way. Banned from Coney Island.” Tony scoffs, rolling his eyes. Then, much softer, “Who bans Iron Man from Coney Island…”

“The ban is almost up,” Peter reminds him. “Then we won’t have to take a jet just for a vacation. Though,” he shrugs looking around the store. “Disney World is pretty fun.”

Yeah, Disney World is pretty fun. Tony’s not exactly a fan of the rides and the people and the characters with the giant heads ( _bleh),_ but he is a fan of spending time with his kids. Peter’s only been away at college for a semester, but Tony misses the kid more than he’d like to admit. But he figures it’s pretty obvious when he set up a little vacation at _Disney World_. But well worth it.

Tony smiles and claps a hand on the back of Peter’s neck, giving it a soft squeeze. “Let’s go pay for all this overpriced junk.” He makes a move to take Morgan off his hands but the kid moves away before he can grab her. Typical. Peter is the _worst_ baby hog, always has been. It’s just been especially bad on this trip since he hasn’t seen her a lot the past few months. To be completely honest, Tony’s not sure he’s held Morgan once _all day._

Truly the world’s worst baby hog.

When they’re at the register, the cashier breaks out in a grin. Peter sets Morgan on the counter and she keeps up with her happy squeals, which, while loud, beat the sharp upsetting cries she will inevitably fall into in...oh, less than an hour, if Tony had to guess. That girl has to be incredibly tired.

“She’s adorable,” the cashier says, gently poking one of Morgan’s shoes. Peter is lost in his own game with her, holding her up and moving her arms around in fake baby punches with bad fight choreography. As Tony's pulling out his wallet, the cashier looks up at him and smiles at him like any normal employee would smile. The beard works yet again, he isn’t recognized, and all is right in the world-

“How old is your granddaughter?”

Tony short circuits. Peter freezes.

The cashier mistakes Tony’s horror for bad hearing, because apparently he’s _just that ancient_ and pulls her attention to Peter. “Sorry? I was just asking how old your daughter is? She looks about the same as my nephew but you can never really tell -”

Peter snaps out of it first. When Tony dares a glance his way, the kid is as red as the hair on Ariel’s head. “Oh, no. No, she’s not….I’m not….this isn’t…”

The kid is drowning, so in superhero fashion, Tony steps in to save the day. “That’s not his baby. That’s _my_ baby. These are…” he rips off his sunglasses and uses them to gesture between the two of them. “These are both my babies. One’s just...bigger than the other.”

Or maybe they both drown.

But finally, one of them decides to not speak like a crazy person. Peter, while still beet red, offers a polite smile to the poor, confused cashier. “Sorry. He’s my dad,” he points to Tony, “and this is my baby sister. She’s 14 months.”

The cashier in unaware of the emotional seesaw she just put them through and simply smiles in relief. “Oh, I’m sorry. My mistake. 14 months! What a big girl she is already,” she coos, poking back at Morgan’s feet before finishing the check out. When she gives the total Tony slips a 100 over the counter, mumbles _keep the change_ , and walks out of the store in a haze.

Granddaughter. She thought Morgan was his _granddaughter._ No. That’s...no. A fluke.  A one time thing-

Then he remembers Peter’s been holding the baby all day. What if it’s not a one time thing? What if everyone thought Morgan was Peter’s daughter and Tony was just the…

“Grandpa.”

Ugh, the word is like a curse. He comes back to reality to find Peter’s standing before him, a smirk on his face. “There are you," the kid goes on. "Lost you for a second. Thought maybe the sun had gotten to you, old man.”

He groans, rolls his eyes, and slips his glasses back on to hide the wrinkles around his eyes because oh yeah he’s _old._ “Don’t call me that, ever.” It’s unfair for Peter to look so smug. He was just freaking out a second ago, too, and he’d like to go back to an even playing field. “You hear me, _dad?”_

Sweet, sweet revenge. Peter pales _immediately. “_ Don't say that! Agh! I can’t believe she thought Morgan was my kid. I’m not old enough to have a kid! I’m not even old enough to drink!”

Oh, a drink. Tony would love a drink right about now. Maybe the whole bottle. But then he sees cute, beautiful, precious Morgan smile and he remembers why he doesn’t drink anymore.

He motions for Peter to hand over the baby and he does without complaint this time. She fusses for a second like she always does when she gets pulled away from Peter, but then she realizes that Dad is wearing really fun Goofy ears on his hat and sticks one of them in her mouth, content.

It’s hard for him to get hung up on something as silly as his age when he’s got the cutest girl in the world resting in his arms.

“It’s fine,” Tony finally says, smoothing the baby hairs down on the back of her head before pressing a kiss there. “At least she thought we were a family.”

“Duh,” Peter smiles. “We are. We’ll be your babies til the end of time,” Peter teases.

Of course. Tony won’t be able to live that down. But then, as quickly as his mistaken identity horror went away, a brand new one takes its place when he sees Peter dig out his cellphone. The kid's got a shit eating grin on his face.

“Don’t you dare,” he says lowly.

“I have to,” Peter shrugs, eyes down on his phone. He blows out a breath. “I’m _contractually obligated.”_

“I’ll kill you. I’ll kill you dead.”

“He has to know.”

Peter is such a little shit.

“Morgan is officially my favorite child until the end of time.”

“I can live with that!” Peter chirps happily as he puts his phone away, the evil text sent. He imagines he'll get a response soon and Tony, quite frankly, can wait for that kind of hell to break loose. “Now,” Peter reaches forward and takes Morgan off his hands again (baby hog) and starts to look around. “Okay, where to….next. Peter Pan’s flight, yeah? Maybe we should…”

Morgan gives a happy squeal and wiggles around just enough to have her slightly over-sized Mickey ears fall off her head. But before any of them can reach down and pick it up, another woman comes to their aid; she's all smiles as she puts it back on Morgan’s head for her.

“There you go, sweetie. Oh, you’re so cute!” she says. “But I bet your dad and grandpa tell you that all the time, yeah?”

Tony short circuits. Peter freezes.

Sometimes, despite the love he has for his kids, everything is terrible.

As soon as she walks away Tony remembers to breathe. “I’m shaving. I’m shaving it off. Tony Stark is making an appearance with his daughter at Animal Kingdom tomorrow.”

“Oh, thank God,” Peter squeaks, almost _throwing_ Morgan back into Tony’s arms. He has a feeling he won’t be much of a baby hog for the rest of the day. “Thank fucking God.”

Tony gasps playfully as he hovers his hands around Morgan’s head. “Watch your mouth! She has too many ears! I don’t know which to cover.”

Peter laughs at that, and everything already feels a little more normal. Just a little.  “Sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Tony waves him off and concentrates on holding Morgan close; he makes sure she has a Goofy ear to play with. “Now where were we: Peter Pan?”

“Yep! The boy who never grows up. Ugh, what a dream."

The irony. He remembers the sophomore in high school who wanted to drop out of high school to be an Avenger. "There was a time you wanted to grow up and be an adult, remember?"

"I was an idiot. Let’s go.”

As they start walking, his phone starts ringing. Tony contemplates on whether he should answer it or just throw his phone in the nearest fountain. In the end, he’s an adult, so he picks it up.

Rhodey’s laughter is _painful._ “What’s up _Grandpa!”_ he wheezes. “How’s the trip? Did they give you a wheelchair or have you been getting along with just a cane.”

“I fucking hate you.”

“ _Dad,_ ” Peter laughs, reaching up to cover Morgan’s Mickey ears. “Too many ears!”

“This is all your fault,” he whispers to Peter, a smile betraying him as he hangs up on Rhodey’s gross laughter. He can’t stay upset when he’s got his daughter in his arms and his son by his side.

But still. He’s shaving the beard. 

**Author's Note:**

> dugfhjhgfls this idea popped into my head last night and I just thought it was really funny. peter may be short and baby faced but he's also jacked and probably carries around a baby like it's No Big Deal (because it isn't he is Strong) so some people might be like "young dad!" and then they see first time dad tony holding his baby and he's got a peppered beard, some sick crow's feet, and knees that click because being a superhero Is Hard and some people might be like "grandpa!!" I know it's dumb I just thought it was funny.


End file.
